This past season has thrust us into adjusting to a living situation that has been unknown and unfamiliar to most humans. Isolation, social distancing, shelter at home all have ringing connotations of living a hidden life. Adapting to this type of environment can have psychological effects that we might not even be aware of. Collins English Dictionary defines isolation as “the state of feeling alone without any friends or help”…which is very similar to the definition attributed to anxiety or trauma. So, if you are feeling the effects of isolation, have experienced anxiety or are even feeling a little traumatized by this whole experience, you are not alone. Millions are feeling the effects in a very similar fashion.

Necessary Changes

Early in this pandemic most people, myself included, welcomed the slowed down pace of life. In fact, it was a gift to “reset” after the frenzy that life had become. Personally, it gave me a chance to zoom out and look at the way I was living my life. Knowing that what I give my attention to is the person I become, I asked myself the question, “What am I doing that I don’t want to be doing and what am I not doing that I want to be doing?” I began to make some adjustments and changes in my internal thinking as well as my external actions. If it’s true, and I think it is, that when it’s all said and done, the totality of my life is summed up in what I gave my attention to. This is a very weighty truth that can be turned into a catalyst empowering you to make changes. Checking in with my heart, I came to conclusions about friendships, identified unhealthy patterns, listened to my internal dialogue, and made changes in areas of nutrition and exercise. But the one area that I gave the most attention to was how was I spending my time? How was I going to transition back into the “new normal” with a different mind set and maintain a slower pace of life? It’s a myth that the busier you are, the more productive you are. Rather, there is productivity from a place of rest, something our society and culture knows very little about. We champion the workaholic and praise the multi-tasker when in reality it has created a society that is very disconnected, burned out and living in a state of frenzy. We have become runners. And no, time is not the problem.  

But, it is time to make a change…

The Invitation to Rest

Jesus invites us: “Are you weary, carrying a heavy burden? Then come to me. I will refresh your life, for I am your oasis. Simply join your life with mine. Learn my ways and you’ll discover that I’m gentle, humble, easy to please. You will find refreshment and rest in me. For all that I require of you will be pleasant and easy to bear.” (Matt 11:28-30 TPT). Sign me up! This sounds like the perfect path out of frenzy into rest. The truth is, a frenzied and hurried life is toxic. Our inability to slow down, pay attention and give our focus to the things in life that we want to shape who we are is killing us. It’s also exposing deeper issues we are running from; fears we don’t want to face, unresolved trauma rearing its ugly head, father-mother wounds, deep insecurities and the list goes on. Or it’s forcing to the surface what we are running to…promotions, material possessions, prestige, things that we believe give us worth or tell us we’re okay. What are you running from or to? Where do you turn when you are weary and tired out, frenzied and burned out? How do you find rest for your soul?

Jesus’s invitation to come (you’re not required to do this alone), be refreshed, join, learn, rest. What happens when you come into the presence of Jesus? Are you able to stay, connect? Do you lose focus, not able to pay attention?

We become what we give our attention to, for better or worse!

Things that Really Matter

Most of us unequivocally would say we want to be more like Jesus, we want to be connected and our lives to be a reflection of who He is. We want to engage with our hearts and flourish from our true self, the idea of who God created us to be. “Come to me” is the invitation. “I am gentle, humble, easy to please” is the guarantee. “For all that I require of you will be pleasant and easy to bear” is the assurance. If more time isn’t the answer, then what is? 

5 Steps to Change

Learn to slow your life down, simplify and turn  your focus to the things that really matter. And giving yourself grace in the process. So what does that look like and how do you start?

1. Accept Jesus’s invitation to come. Frankly, it may feel awkward at first but come with anticipation to be refreshed, to join in, to learn but most of all to rest. You will be transformed.
2. Accept your limitations. You are not required to live every day to capacity; potential YES, capacity NO. It’s okay to have energy at the end of the day…
3. Learn to say NO! It’s not selfish and it’s not mean. As Anne Lamott graciously points out: “No” is a complete sentence. Saying no to one thing means you can say yes to what really matters. 
4. Lose your phone! Not literally, but seriously, put the phone down. The average human touches or reaches for their phone over 2,000x a day. Seriously, it’s a problem. 
5. Incorporate Sabbath rest one day a week. After God created the heavens and the earth, he rested…and He’s God. 

Live life deliberately. In the words of CS Lewis:
“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending”